


Alone in my mind

by Lisanne_1703



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Bonding, M/M, Sad Derek, Supportive Stiles Stilinski
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-20
Updated: 2018-03-20
Packaged: 2019-04-05 07:11:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14038932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lisanne_1703/pseuds/Lisanne_1703
Summary: Derek sat alone in the dark staring out of the window. "What am I even doing here?" This wasn't the first time this thought went through his head. It was the first time he couldn't get it out of his head though..The story where friends are there even when you think they're not.





	Alone in my mind

**Author's Note:**

> Derek feels alone and it doesn't go unnoticed.
> 
> For everyone who feels alone, you are not. There are people out there to help.
> 
> This is my first story and English is not my native language, so I'm sorry for any mistakes or grammatical errors.

After the pack meeting everyone went home. Lately it was often like that. Everyone was busy so no one would bother to stick around a little longer than needed. That meant that it was the seventh day in a row that Derek stayed behind. Alone. And that whole week he began to notice more and more how alone he felt.

He sat down by the window and stared. This weird feeling showed up. What was it? Loneliness? How could he feel alone while he has his pack? The rest of the night he spent thinking about that.

He grabbed his chair and took place in front of the window. It was a good view. He could see a few trees and the rest of the perserve. It felt satisfying to watch how all the different colored leaves fall down to the ground. With every leaf that fell Derek began to feel more alone. He could imagine how the tree would feel without all those leaves to keep him warm.

-

Stiles was the first one to arrive for the pack meeting. He automatically sat down on the couch, it was a routine nowadays. "Hey Derek, I'm a little early. The rest is not here yet I see?"

"No they are not. They will be here soon I guess." The reply was mumbeld like Derek didn't really care. Stiles sat up a little straighter and looked over. "Hey, are you okay? Not excited to see them, are you?" Stiles wanted for Derek to respond.  
"I'm just a little tired is all", Derek mumbeld back. It was not like Derek to be this indifferent. But if he was tired that would explain it.

The conversation was cut of by the pack walking in. "Hey guys, shall we begin the meeting?", said Scott. 

The meeting went by without anything special. And when everyone left Derek was back where he started that day. In front of his window. Watching how the leaves fell from the trees.

-

Meanwhile when Scott walked with Stiles to his jeep. "Did you notice Derek acting weird tonight?", Scott asked Stiles. Stiles looked up, he thought he was the only one who noticed. "Yeah, he was just tired he said. But i don't know.", he responded to Scott. Scott noticed his concern immediatly: "Don't worry about it man. It's probably nothing then." But Stiles was sure it was more than that.

-

Derek was familiair with this feeling. It is what he felt for a long time after the fire. But he didn't for a long time and he didn't miss the feeling. 

When you're staring out of the window there is so much to see. And at the same time you can see nothing at all. It's just how you look at it. How much time can you waste by just sitting there and doing nothing? Well a lot if you asked Derek. But he was really honest with himself, he couldn't find anything else to do now anyway.

-

The concern for Derek didn't pass in the following days. So after school Stiles made a decision he would just go by and see how Derek was doing. Sitting in his jeep Stiles wondered why he worried at all. Derek was just a friend right and he was okay? He just needed to make sure that was true. 

The door from the loft wasn't closed, so Stiles just walked right in. "Hey Derek, are you home?" It looked like no one was there. Everything was left like it was at the last meeting, but that was two days ago. Stiles began to worry more and more, he walked further in the loft. Derek was nowhere to be seen, where could he be?

In the bedroom Derek heard the sound of the door opening. He just couldn't find himself to care. He was so lost in feeling alone he didn't hear his door open. "Derek, are you in there?", it was Stiles. Another leaf fell down, a yellow one this time. The tree was almost completely empty. When another leaf fell down Derek felt this weight on his shoulder.  
"Hey man, are you okay?" Stiles was shocked to see Derek like this. How long has this been going on?

Derek turned to Stiles, "I've been watching this tree in front of us since the beginning of fall. And it kinda represents what I felt since then. The tree was full of different colored leaves, the wind was blowing through it and it just looked peacefull. Everyday since then leaves started falling of though. And look at the tree now. Just a empty brown tree. Which no one would care for and no one would find it worth to look at longer than a second. Look I'm okay, just go home. I'll see you later."

Stiles didn't know how to respond to that. "Uhmm you know that's the most i heard you say in one go." And he took a good look at that tree.

Derek looked Stiles straight in the eyes this time. "Look I'm not in the mood to talk or to be made fun off. Just go home." When he saw Stiles walking away he looked at the tree again. He was disappointed, he hoped Stiles had stayed. But it was just reminder that he wasn't worth it. A chair was placed next to his and a tissue was placed in his hand. It was then Derek noticed he was crying and Stiles stayed.

"It is still a nice tree you know. It is just vulnerable right now. You are seeing the true from of the tree. Give him some time and he will overcome the hard times ahead in the winter. After that he will grow back into that beautiful tree again. Even more beautiful than he was in fall. He just needs to stay strong and give himself some time." Derek had to really think about that. Was all he needed time? 

They sat together in silence for awhile. Eventually Stiles stond up and left, with the offer to be there when Derek needed to talk. And Derek thought about what Stiles after he went home.

-

When the next pack meeting arrived Derek felt a little better. Stiles noticed. What made Derek smile though was everyone staring after the pack meeting was finished. "I think were going to hang around to watch a movie with you if that's okay.", was what Scott suggested. Derek was more than okay with that.

And if every pack meeting after that ended the same, with Stiles sitting closely next to him on the couch while watching a movie together with the pack, it was just how it was supposed to be. And Stiles was right. That tree really did get beautiful again.

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed the story!


End file.
